Breaking the Masculine Mask: Why Men's Mental Health Matters

June is Men’s Mental Health Month in the U.S. and serves as a reminder to raise awareness and start conversations around the mental health challenges many men face every day. Conversations about mental health have become more visible over the past decade, especially on social media, but there is still a large gap when it comes to the discussion around men’s emotional health and wellbeing.

Men are often taught from a young age to hide pain and to suppress their emotions and to “be strong,” leading many to push through and struggle in silence. Vulnerability and showing emotions are misunderstood as weakness, resulting in many men feeling isolated and alone as they struggle with stress, anxiety, sadness, burnout, grief, and other human emotions.

Mental health struggles can impact anyone regardless of age, gender, or background. Hearts 4 Minds is dedicated to breaking down the stigma around mental health and to remind people from all walks of life that it is ok to ask for help.

Wearing the “Masculine Mask”

From as early as a couple years old, many boys are directly and indirectly given messages of how to act and “be a man.” They often hear the phrases, “man up,” “be strong,” or “don’t cry” when it comes to their emotions. However, bottling up emotions and living up to an unrealistic expectation creates the “masculine mask.” This mask carries the pressure to appear emotionally stable 24/7, leaving many men to feel that they need to be independent, strong, and confident, even when they are struggling.

However, this expectation and suppression of emotions play a significant toll on mental and physical wellbeing. Bottling up emotions can cause men to bury or express their emotions in unhealthy ways. This expression can be seen in ways such as:

• Emotional withdrawal

• Alcohol or substance use

• Irritability or anger

• Burnout

• Risky behavior

• Headaches

• Fatigue

• Insomnia

• Difficulties concentrating on daily tasks

These struggles are not often viewed as signs of mental health issues and can lead men to go undiagnosed for years.

Why Many Find It Easier To Stay Quiet

Many men are afraid of the stigma surrounding mental health struggles. Men, especially those who were taught from a young age to “toughen up,” feel that emotional struggles make them appear weak, fragile, unreliable, or incapable in the eyes of their peers, co-workers, or loved ones. Those who did try to reach out for help in the past, but were dismissed or put down, are especially aware of the stigma and over time struggle in silence.

Culturally, there is an expectation that men need to be strong and support themselves on their own. While independence is positive, it can be extremely harmful if someone feels like they can not reach out for help when they need it.

Unfortunately, mental health struggles are not something you can ignore. The longer you silently struggle, the more feelings of depression, loneliness, and disconnect grow.

Mental Health Statistics in Men

Men are less likely than women to seek out professional help during a mental health crisis. Depression, anxiety, and feelings of isolation often are undiagnosed in men because many do not feel comfortable or supported enough to actively seek the help they deserve.

According to the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC), over 49,000 people died by suicide in 2023, or one death every 11 minutes. Men are four times more likely to commit suicide compared to women with 22.7 deaths per 100,000 people. These statistics are more than numbers on a page. Each number represents a person who felt trapped, isolated, and fearful of expressing the struggles they were experiencing.

Discussing mental health struggles does not need to be a taboo topic and no one should feel ashamed for asking for support and help.

Building a Community of Support

All it takes is one call. One call to a friend, family member, or therapist can begin the journey towards healing. Strength is not about appearing stable when you are internally struggling. Strength is having the courage to reach out to others when you need support. Building a community is an important part of the healing journey and can take on many different forms.

Talking with a family member, close friend, or meeting with a counselor or therapist is a great first step to take to get the support you deserve. There are also many support groups specifically for men, allowing them to healthily express their emotions and learn more about how to open up about stress, grief, and anxiety.

It is important to check in on friends and the men in our lives to ensure that they know they are loved and supported. Even a quick text or phone call can save a life and give someone the encouragement they need to seek help. Creating a safe and supportive environment where men feel comfortable expressing their emotions creates a meaningful impact in reducing the stigma surrounding mental health.

A Reminder this Father’s Day

June also celebrates Father’s Day, a day to celebrate fathers and father figures. Instead of gifts and cards this Father’s Day, check in on the fathers and men in your life and genuinely ask how they are doing. Remember, while Father’s Day is often a celebrated and joyful occasion, it can also stir up challenging emotions, especially for those grieving a father or those who did not have a positive father figure in their lives. Giving them the space to have an open and honest conversation is a great step in creating a meaningful support system.

Sometimes the best support system is simply giving someone the space to open up and feel safe.

Breaking down the barriers and encouraging conversations about men’s mental health begins with you. Starting with open conversations about emotions and truly listening without judgment or criticism opens the door for deeper talks. Encouraging the men in our lives to seek counseling or therapy and ensuring them that getting help is not a sign of weakness but rather of strength is vital.

Additionally, teaching boys from an early age that it is healthy to be vulnerable and have emotions is a critical step in permanently changing the views of mental health in men. Teach healthy coping mechanisms and remind boys and men that asking for help is courageous. Remember, mental health struggles do not define a person!

This Men’s Mental Health Month, remember that it is possible to break the “masculine mask” and create a positive culture surrounding mental health. Creating a culture where men feel safe and supported in discussing and addressing their struggles is a good first step forward.

Hearts 4 Minds is committed to breaking down the stigma around mental illness. To learn more about Hearts 4 Minds, reach out to us! You can support us in furthering our mission by exploring volunteer opportunities, wearing our merchandise, and donating to Hearts 4 Minds.

If you or someone you know is experiencing a mental health crisis, Text LIFE to 741741. Trained therapists are available 24/7 to assist. You are not alone!